bold faced lying

so I've been playing a lot of hooky at the cannery to get on this boat. at first i had to walk the docks to find a job, now we've been working on the engine for a week and the mechanic missed his flight yesterday because his 12 passenger plane to get here got hit by a seagull. so I've been sleeping at the bunkhouse for a place to stay, but have been keeping a low pro. and last night was a blur. i just remember rapping with a chef to young jeezy at the reluctant fisherman bar and then peeing in somebodies boots on my way to bed.

so this afternoon, bill, the bunkhouse manager wakes me up out of a dead sleep. he's chill he's got a tattoo of a mushroom on his arm and he goes, "David! wake up! fresh market wants to see you! they wanna know why you've been missing for 3 days! work your magic!

i stumble out of bed drunk as a skunk. throw some water on my face and be sure to rinse my mouth with scope.

i get interrogated by 3 Filipino's who are high on meth with a Mexican girl in the back watching my every move.

"David! why are you not working?!?"
"cuz I'm sick, my roommates sick, everybody who works here is sick, it was only a matter of time that i got sick."
"so we take you to doctor!"
"NO!, fuck the doctor, i gotta pay $200 dollars just to walk in his front door, i ain't got the cash.
"what are your symptoms?!?"
"i cant keep anything down, it goes down one end or the other, ask anybody."
"and what are you taking?!?"
"uhh...dayquil,nyquil it cures all (slurring my words)"
"NOOO! you take peptobismal, you got wrong medicine! you need pink stuff!
...Is that alcohol i smell on your breath?"
"what?...your trippin'. that's a sin."
"i smell alcohol David!"
"naw man. that's a sin. like these Muslims. i can't drink or i go to hell. maybe you smell my toothpaste. i use scope. that's what yer smellin'."
"OK FINE! we cannot write you up because you are sick and you cannot work!"
"what? you gonna write me up because I'm sick?'
"NO! you listen! you take peptobismal! pink stuff! and go to bed! come to work tomorrow!
"whatever."
and i stumble out of there laughing my ass off in my head.